I cannot quite believe how fast it has gone. It has been the most amazing time of my life in fact, which I know sounds a bit cheesy, but it has. When Charlie was first born, it was still pretty cold, so for the first couple of weeks we spent most days snuggled in bed under the duvet, watching Jezza and This Morning. Then, once the weather got better, we have been out and about most days; meeting other mummies and babies, wandering around town, walking along the promenade and doing the odd bit of shopping! It has been wonderful and I am genuinely sad that those lovely days are now over.
I do think it's time that Charlie starts to be with other people, I feel that being around other children, particularly, will help him grow and learn and he needs new experiences. But I am still sad that from 8am-4pm he will be with someone else. I am very aware that I could miss him first crawling, or later on walking and talking. But, when we planned a baby, I knew that when he would be six months I would have to return to work.
I do, however, feel grateful that I have had these six months. I know not everyone has this opportunity and has to return a lot sooner than I have, so I know I should feel grateful. At the beginning I worried how Charlie would cope without me. I was at the centre of his world back then. But now, as he's getting a bit older, I see that actually, he will cope without me, he will be fine. He doesn't need me as exclusively as he did when he was tiny and only feeding from me. He's eating food now as well as still taking milk. But that makes me sad. He's growing way too fast and me being at work will miss a lot of this.
However I am staying positive; I have some lovely friends at work, it will be nice to see them and talk about other things than baby TV and what Charlie had for lunch that day. It will be nice to use my brain again. I am though, aware of the irony that basically I am leaving my son with someone else so I can go and look after other people's children!!
Because I am going back to work and am a slightly different shape than I was before being pregnant, I of course, have had to buy a few new bits for work! Such as this gorgeous dog jumper and this lovely dress.
And of course I had to buy a new bag! I chose the Zara office bag that I saw Charlotte with from writelikenooneswatching. It's a fabulous bag and I love it! So these things are easing the pain of going back to work, but I am still sad.
I will cherish our weekends together and our evenings and I know that I have his lovely smiley face to look forward to when I pick him up. And I know he will have lots of fun with his new friends.
But I will miss him...
mummystartingout x
